[ . . . . he listens to her thoughtfully for a moment, before reaching out and letting one of his hands rest over the top of hers.]
You didn't go after her because you wanted to, Hilda. You wouldn't have harmed anyone at all, if you had a choice - but put in a situation where you did have to.... You also can't be expected to lay down your life, when you want to live too. Some people might be that self-sacrificial, in general or in certain situations, but you don't have to be.
I'd rather you live, and just continue being the person you are, instead of having to meet anyone's expectations. You are already someone worth knowing and trusting.
[because it sounds like it's something that bothers her. soo-won is empathetic and kind - but he also feels disillusioned at times by what people might expect. they're all just people making choices. good and bad are relative, as are right and wrong.
why can't they just live as they are, and try to help people? even if it doesn't look pretty.]
Ah - I misspoke. I meant... the information gleaned from Wolf and Fox's teams this past week. But I haven't spoken to Tiger yet either. I might need to inquire with the people on their team to see if they'd be willing to share the information.
[ she regards him surprise, her hand twitching briefly beneath his. it's a strange relief—because hilda doesn't regret what she did, because she had to make a choice and she lives with it, but she doesn't expect many people to understand, either. there are so many people here who have never lost a fight, who have never been in a position where killing is the kinder of two difficult choices.
to have that is a strange comfort. is it so wrong, that she doesn't want to die? maybe. but she's grateful that someone understands her selfishness anyway. she smiles, gently putting her other hand atop his. ]
...I trust you too.
[ it's hard for her to reach for genuine sentiment sometimes, her voice a bit more hesitant than usual, but she does trust him. it's no small thing, in this place.
her other hand flits away quickly enough. ]
And don't worry—I'm not ready to die for anyone. [ ... ] Um, anyway... I'm going to keep pressing my lead from Tiger's team to figure it out. I'm planning on trying to talk to them myself, but it's probably better that someone from their own team asks? And after what Fox told me, I'm a little worried.
[ because—yeah. not a good look so far. ]
I haven't figured out what the other team was yet, though. [ hopefully? it wasn't two tigers? ]
[and he'll give her hand a gentle, brief squeeze. because the truth of the matter is that this place is full of idealists - and soo-won loves them, the same way that he loves even the jaded and the pessimists.
but they aren't always able to understand what needs to be done, or why some actions can't be labeled evil just because they don't fit in a utopia.]
Tiger this week...? [he tilts his head] Are you certain? From the people I've asked on Tiger's team, they haven't reported to me that the icon is blinking.
But... yes. While Leaders can reveal information to people who aren't on their teams, it's probably easier for them to do so to someone that they trust.
[a beat]
Last week... it was Wolf and Fox. This week... if it wasn't Tiger, Goat, or Rabbit... that leaves Wolf, Fox, and Swan.
[ she answers that with a little smile, but sets her focus back on what's going on, her gratitude shifting into a little wince. ]
Ohhh... you know, I bet they got confused because Tiger's team didn't get a memory back until this week. I'll have to go clear things up with them.
[ she sighs, folding her hands around her teacup. ]
I hope it's not Fox—I tried talking to them last week, and they're pretty tough to crack. The other two seem a little more straightforward, at least. I tried talking to Emet-Selch too, but he said he'd already told his team too many people during the week—though so I guess he's alive, so I could just ask him tomorrow.
[ ...she taps her cup a little. ]
It's either that Fox lied to both of us this last week, or... I'm starting to wonder if our leaders will only learn more if there's more kills on the same team. So far they've been so spread out...
[rip tiger's team, still no kills or memories damb. but soo-won just hums thoughtfully]
Wolf is amiable with me, and he's the reason that I got this week's information but.... I'd like to gather more from the other leaders first before we proceed.
.... shall we have a meeting with Goat and Rabbit tomorrow? If murders are truly tied to information... While I understand that we gets parts of it from the adventures that we're whisked into on Wednesday...
Yeah, I think they mistook the personal memory that Tiger got with one of the ones your leader gets for killing...
[ team tiger slowly catching up... but with that much cleared up, she frowns. ]
We could try? Can they meet us like that? I think it's worth trying to figure out more about this with them, since they both know what we've done. Things are getting weird lately... [ some of it is definitely from team sharing, but the glitchiness, the way the PHS displays messages. it's not a good sign. ] I wonder if it means we're running out of time.
Ah - though that reminds me.... Tiger said something interesting during the course of the trial, regarding whether or not it's possible to confess. Clearly Emet-Selch proved that you can.... but he and I both enacted in self-defense murders.
Did you think it possible to confess what you'd done? Not whether or not you were going to [because he really established he does not care that hilda wasn't self-sacrificing] but if you could have.
It could just be me fretting... It just feels like things have been breaking down this week. Hopefully it'll get better now that people are more cautious about sharing teams.
[ if the glitching stops, that's probably a good sign? ]
And no, I couldn't. I was actually a little surprised that Emet-Selch could say it so clearly... [ she thinks for a moment, trying to sort out the timeline in her head. ] Both Shima and I were asked on Wednesday night. So I did have some time to talk about it beforehand, but once Friday hit, I just—couldn't anymore. And then after everything was resolved with trial, I could tell it was okay again.
[ she takes a sip of her tea, though it doesn't clear her troubled expression. ]
So depending on the circumstances behind Sumire's death, I don't think her killer could've confessed, even if they wanted to. Of course, we don't know why she was killed...
.... we don't, but we can infer based on patterns, can't we? Unless the nova suddenly stopped splintering this week - which would also be great news - but how likely is it? If Emet-Selch was self-defense, then...
[sumire's nova had to be splintering, and her death had to be related to someone's brutality, right? he frowns.]
.... is that when you told Zuko, then? On Wednesday night. Or did he infer it, based on your request that he not mention your axe?
Mm, no, not quite. I told someone else Thursday, before everyone fell asleep. They were the one showing those serious memory issues, which I think was a symptom of the nova starting to splinter. After I— [ ... ] Once I killed Cater, they got better. I think her memory might've been acting up too. Shima told me he didn't notice anything like that, though.
[ she sounds a little annoyed by this. if he was going to go and kill someone, he should've confirmed things better... ]
Zuko figured it out once I, um—try to lie to him about the axe. [ ahah. ] Surprised he took it as well as he did, honestly. But that was later.
[ ugh plot. she takes a tea break, thinking. ]
I also spoke to Emet-Selch, and he mentioned Shiro was acting erratically. Apparently, they hadn't even spoken that week—so it didn't make much sense to see Emet as a threat all the sudden. He said he didn't think Emet was splintering, but he felt like he had to kill before it could happen.
It makes me wonder if maybe something was wrong with Shiro.
[he doesn't seem to mind but - hilda's talking around him like she hasn't given soo-won the puzzle pieces to figure it out, but that's okay. he imagined as much.]
.... Shiro and I spoke on Thursday night. Nothing about his behavior seemed odd to me.
[though it seems - he's not going into the details of it just yet? he pauses for a moment before tapping his finger on the table.]
.... There's something I'm willing to tell you - but I'd like to request to both you and Rabbit that it remain as tightly under wraps as possible. This information spreading too far out of our control won't be helpful in the slightest.
[the apologetic smile gets a more certain one in return - he doesn't mind. he understands it, really. he just wanted to confirm and let her know that she doesn't have to talk around him.
but.]
.... Shiro told me that according to a Leader, in order for everyone on one team to be revived, that team needs to orchestrate at least two murders. When we met... he had quite a bit of coffee and while I don't want to blame his erratic behavior on that -
I do think that he was intending to attack Emet-Selch with a sense of purpose as a result of the information that he heard. Perhaps he thought that Emet-Selch was going to harm someone, or if we all thought that his nova was splintering then we'd remove Emet-Selch anyway.
.... I'm fracturing my word to a Leader by sharing this. But I do trust you, and I believe it's already beginning to spread. So I hope.... you understand why I don't want it to become common knowledge.
[ for them to share and trust so much with each other directly—it makes her nervous, being handed something so important like she can do anything good with this knowledge, but she has to try. she likes won enough to... try. ]
Ugh, seriously?
[ she presses her cheek into her palm, sighing. what an unpleasant stipulation. ]
Don't worry, I'll keep it to myself. Things could get really messy if people decide to take things into their own hands.
[ even though they're already doing that, but she trusts the two of them to be thoughtful about it. ] But that probably means none of the teams are safe so far. [ or at most, like one is. ]
It depends on what happened this past weekend - Emet-Selch hasn't trusted me with his team, which makes it impossible to verify unless someone else has been keeping track of the teams as closely as we have. Worse comes to worst... I may need to ask next week, when it'll be harder to identify his team.
[if there are four murders and they're all from different teams then it'll be harder to suspect which one emet-selch was on, right?? though his hope is that he can talk a leader into telling him anyway.]
My current guess is that perhaps the task of handling the nova splintering will be spread amongst the different teams. So that means we need to wait for Goat's turn, or.... there is a chance someone on Rabbit might need to act again.
[at least, between the two of them, that's what they've figured out]
It sounds like Swan hasn't been able to recall anything at all, which puts them in danger.
I have a guess about Emet-Selch's team... but PHSs not blinking definitely makes it more difficult to tell what happened. And I doubt Sumire's killer is going to speak up to anyone after trial got so messy.
[ but she nods along in general. ]
It does seem like the leader that detects the splintering changes every week, assuming that's what happened this weekend. [ her expression folds a little, her fingers drumming against her teacup. goat's turn could come up, and soo-won's murder would help them hit the second body they need. but for rabbit? ...this is all so grisly. ]
If I'm thinking this through right... [ seven victims between five teams. ] If Swan hasn't regained any memories, then one team is already safe. Maybe two, since we don't know which team Virid was on.
I'll have to talk to Rabbit, but if it's not either of our teams, then it's Wolf, Fox, or Tiger.
Unless Virid was on Tiger's team... they hadn't had a single kill until - possibly this weekend. [but that remains unconfirmed] But... perhaps it might be Wolf or Fox. We'll need to see if Rabbit learned anything.
At the very least... there are more teams that we will need to look after. While I think that... if I'm careful about the information, I may be able to tell some who might be willing to help us reach the threshold...
I would like to verify first what numbers are needed in order to make it so.
[ . . . ]
And given that Rabbit's turn for nova splintering has already passed.... Let me know, if you need anything from me.
[soo-won will honest to god cover for like. any murder that he doesn't feel like pursuing, apparently.]
Yeah... it's possible both kills this weekend were Tiger's team, but we'll have to check. Let me ask Rabbit and get back to you.
[ as soon as she says it though, she groans a little. ]
I really doubt it though. Do you know any other rabbits? Because, um— [ she makes a face. ] Rabbit even said she picked me because the others were more likely to fail.
... No, I'm sorry. I think that people were slower to share their teams, given the disruption with the Realm, but in general no one else has confessed being part of Rabbit's team to me. Though... if anyone does -
Do you want me to point them in your direction? It wouldn't count against either of you...
[he nods in agreement with that - he doesn't mind helping gather the rabbits if it'll make life easier for hilda.
but.]
... should you choose to take action, you know that I won't let you face it alone.
[because the facts of the matter are - well, simple. he doesn't care so much about nova generation that he'll let people catch hilda without issue. not when ultimately, if she does choose to kill someone, it will be in order to save her team.
but - ]
.... I'm not sure if I'm willing to wait for that to happen, regarding Goat's team. My hope is that he'll have his turn soon in noticing the nova splintering... but if he doesn't, or it's instead proven that it's random and will go to the same Leader again -
I'm afraid my life and my ability to return is not something I can take a chance on. [he tilts his head] My life arguably has no more worth than any other.... but I cannot abandon my kingdom.
[and for that, he'll get his hands dirty time and time again. that is the responsibility of a king.]
[ heavy is the head that wears the crown, huh? she feels for him—to live not for himself, but for the fate of his entire country—because it can't be an easy thing. because he is a kind man, no matter what he's driven to do. ]
...I don't envy you, Won. I couldn't carry the weight of that responsibility.
[ she doesn't even want to consider that she'll have to kill again, though she's growing resigned to the idea. ]
But I guess there's no helping how this is turning out, huh? I'm not ready to die for anyone here—so I'll be there for you, too. [ it makes sense for them to go into this together, they can cover for each other. and it's not about camaraderie. she has to remind herself of that a lot, recently—she won't die for her friends. she won't. and she doesn't expect anyone to do the same for her. ] It's silly to try and weigh lives anyway. No one here deserves to die more than anyone else. If you ask me, some people just have to make tougher calls than others.
[ she had to make a decision, and there's nothing in her smile now that falters—she isn't so weak-willed as to regret what she's done. and she'll be there for him through thick or thin, even through those ugly choices. ]
.... I don't know how I feel about the idea of dying for anyone. Maybe I don't know what I would do until the moment appeared in front of me... but instead of declaring that you'd die for someone - wouldn't you rather hear that they'd live alongside you instead?
[is it truly a big compliment, to hear from someone that they think that their life is more expendable than yours? he'd thought about it, since the trial over the weekend and the decision that chiron made. is that something admirable?
he doesn't think so.
but perhaps that is the feelings of someone who has always been left behind, who does not find death glamorous or inviting.]
But - regardless, we are in agreement. Rather than inviting any misfortune with death pacts....
I hope to live with you to the end of all this, Hilda, and beyond. Whatever that may take.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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You didn't go after her because you wanted to, Hilda. You wouldn't have harmed anyone at all, if you had a choice - but put in a situation where you did have to.... You also can't be expected to lay down your life, when you want to live too. Some people might be that self-sacrificial, in general or in certain situations, but you don't have to be.
I'd rather you live, and just continue being the person you are, instead of having to meet anyone's expectations. You are already someone worth knowing and trusting.
[because it sounds like it's something that bothers her. soo-won is empathetic and kind - but he also feels disillusioned at times by what people might expect. they're all just people making choices. good and bad are relative, as are right and wrong.
why can't they just live as they are, and try to help people? even if it doesn't look pretty.]
Ah - I misspoke. I meant... the information gleaned from Wolf and Fox's teams this past week. But I haven't spoken to Tiger yet either. I might need to inquire with the people on their team to see if they'd be willing to share the information.
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to have that is a strange comfort. is it so wrong, that she doesn't want to die? maybe. but she's grateful that someone understands her selfishness anyway. she smiles, gently putting her other hand atop his. ]
...I trust you too.
[ it's hard for her to reach for genuine sentiment sometimes, her voice a bit more hesitant than usual, but she does trust him. it's no small thing, in this place.
her other hand flits away quickly enough. ]
And don't worry—I'm not ready to die for anyone. [ ... ] Um, anyway... I'm going to keep pressing my lead from Tiger's team to figure it out. I'm planning on trying to talk to them myself, but it's probably better that someone from their own team asks? And after what Fox told me, I'm a little worried.
[ because—yeah. not a good look so far. ]
I haven't figured out what the other team was yet, though. [ hopefully? it wasn't two tigers? ]
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[and he'll give her hand a gentle, brief squeeze. because the truth of the matter is that this place is full of idealists - and soo-won loves them, the same way that he loves even the jaded and the pessimists.
but they aren't always able to understand what needs to be done, or why some actions can't be labeled evil just because they don't fit in a utopia.]
Tiger this week...? [he tilts his head] Are you certain? From the people I've asked on Tiger's team, they haven't reported to me that the icon is blinking.
But... yes. While Leaders can reveal information to people who aren't on their teams, it's probably easier for them to do so to someone that they trust.
[a beat]
Last week... it was Wolf and Fox. This week... if it wasn't Tiger, Goat, or Rabbit... that leaves Wolf, Fox, and Swan.
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Ohhh... you know, I bet they got confused because Tiger's team didn't get a memory back until this week. I'll have to go clear things up with them.
[ she sighs, folding her hands around her teacup. ]
I hope it's not Fox—I tried talking to them last week, and they're pretty tough to crack. The other two seem a little more straightforward, at least. I tried talking to Emet-Selch too, but he said he'd already told his team too many people during the week—though so I guess he's alive, so I could just ask him tomorrow.
[ ...she taps her cup a little. ]
It's either that Fox lied to both of us this last week, or... I'm starting to wonder if our leaders will only learn more if there's more kills on the same team. So far they've been so spread out...
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[rip tiger's team, still no kills or memories damb. but soo-won just hums thoughtfully]
Wolf is amiable with me, and he's the reason that I got this week's information but.... I'd like to gather more from the other leaders first before we proceed.
.... shall we have a meeting with Goat and Rabbit tomorrow? If murders are truly tied to information... While I understand that we gets parts of it from the adventures that we're whisked into on Wednesday...
I worry that it is not enough to work with.
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[ team tiger slowly catching up... but with that much cleared up, she frowns. ]
We could try? Can they meet us like that? I think it's worth trying to figure out more about this with them, since they both know what we've done. Things are getting weird lately... [ some of it is definitely from team sharing, but the glitchiness, the way the PHS displays messages. it's not a good sign. ] I wonder if it means we're running out of time.
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Do you think that we're running out of time....?
Ah - though that reminds me.... Tiger said something interesting during the course of the trial, regarding whether or not it's possible to confess. Clearly Emet-Selch proved that you can.... but he and I both enacted in self-defense murders.
Did you think it possible to confess what you'd done? Not whether or not you were going to [because he really established he does not care that hilda wasn't self-sacrificing] but if you could have.
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[ if the glitching stops, that's probably a good sign? ]
And no, I couldn't. I was actually a little surprised that Emet-Selch could say it so clearly... [ she thinks for a moment, trying to sort out the timeline in her head. ] Both Shima and I were asked on Wednesday night. So I did have some time to talk about it beforehand, but once Friday hit, I just—couldn't anymore. And then after everything was resolved with trial, I could tell it was okay again.
[ she takes a sip of her tea, though it doesn't clear her troubled expression. ]
So depending on the circumstances behind Sumire's death, I don't think her killer could've confessed, even if they wanted to. Of course, we don't know why she was killed...
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[sumire's nova had to be splintering, and her death had to be related to someone's brutality, right? he frowns.]
.... is that when you told Zuko, then? On Wednesday night. Or did he infer it, based on your request that he not mention your axe?
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[ she sounds a little annoyed by this. if he was going to go and kill someone, he should've confirmed things better... ]
Zuko figured it out once I, um—try to lie to him about the axe. [ ahah. ] Surprised he took it as well as he did, honestly. But that was later.
[ ugh plot. she takes a tea break, thinking. ]
I also spoke to Emet-Selch, and he mentioned Shiro was acting erratically. Apparently, they hadn't even spoken that week—so it didn't make much sense to see Emet as a threat all the sudden. He said he didn't think Emet was splintering, but he felt like he had to kill before it could happen.
It makes me wonder if maybe something was wrong with Shiro.
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[he doesn't seem to mind but - hilda's talking around him like she hasn't given soo-won the puzzle pieces to figure it out, but that's okay. he imagined as much.]
.... Shiro and I spoke on Thursday night. Nothing about his behavior seemed odd to me.
[though it seems - he's not going into the details of it just yet? he pauses for a moment before tapping his finger on the table.]
.... There's something I'm willing to tell you - but I'd like to request to both you and Rabbit that it remain as tightly under wraps as possible. This information spreading too far out of our control won't be helpful in the slightest.
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Uh-oh, that sounds serious.
[ she has an idea what this is about, but maybe she was hoping someone else would deal with it. ]
Okay... go ahead.
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but.]
.... Shiro told me that according to a Leader, in order for everyone on one team to be revived, that team needs to orchestrate at least two murders. When we met... he had quite a bit of coffee and while I don't want to blame his erratic behavior on that -
I do think that he was intending to attack Emet-Selch with a sense of purpose as a result of the information that he heard. Perhaps he thought that Emet-Selch was going to harm someone, or if we all thought that his nova was splintering then we'd remove Emet-Selch anyway.
.... I'm fracturing my word to a Leader by sharing this. But I do trust you, and I believe it's already beginning to spread. So I hope.... you understand why I don't want it to become common knowledge.
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Ugh, seriously?
[ she presses her cheek into her palm, sighing. what an unpleasant stipulation. ]
Don't worry, I'll keep it to myself. Things could get really messy if people decide to take things into their own hands.
[ even though they're already doing that, but she trusts the two of them to be thoughtful about it. ] But that probably means none of the teams are safe so far. [ or at most, like one is. ]
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[if there are four murders and they're all from different teams then it'll be harder to suspect which one emet-selch was on, right?? though his hope is that he can talk a leader into telling him anyway.]
My current guess is that perhaps the task of handling the nova splintering will be spread amongst the different teams. So that means we need to wait for Goat's turn, or.... there is a chance someone on Rabbit might need to act again.
[at least, between the two of them, that's what they've figured out]
It sounds like Swan hasn't been able to recall anything at all, which puts them in danger.
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[ but she nods along in general. ]
It does seem like the leader that detects the splintering changes every week, assuming that's what happened this weekend. [ her expression folds a little, her fingers drumming against her teacup. goat's turn could come up, and soo-won's murder would help them hit the second body they need. but for rabbit? ...this is all so grisly. ]
If I'm thinking this through right... [ seven victims between five teams. ] If Swan hasn't regained any memories, then one team is already safe. Maybe two, since we don't know which team Virid was on.
I'll have to talk to Rabbit, but if it's not either of our teams, then it's Wolf, Fox, or Tiger.
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Unless Virid was on Tiger's team... they hadn't had a single kill until - possibly this weekend. [but that remains unconfirmed] But... perhaps it might be Wolf or Fox. We'll need to see if Rabbit learned anything.
At the very least... there are more teams that we will need to look after. While I think that... if I'm careful about the information, I may be able to tell some who might be willing to help us reach the threshold...
I would like to verify first what numbers are needed in order to make it so.
[ . . . ]
And given that Rabbit's turn for nova splintering has already passed.... Let me know, if you need anything from me.
[soo-won will honest to god cover for like. any murder that he doesn't feel like pursuing, apparently.]
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[ as soon as she says it though, she groans a little. ]
I really doubt it though. Do you know any other rabbits? Because, um— [ she makes a face. ] Rabbit even said she picked me because the others were more likely to fail.
[ if that says anything about team rabbit. ]
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soo-won slowly blinks at that.]
... No, I'm sorry. I think that people were slower to share their teams, given the disruption with the Realm, but in general no one else has confessed being part of Rabbit's team to me. Though... if anyone does -
Do you want me to point them in your direction? It wouldn't count against either of you...
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[ at least they can play information telephone, as usual. ]
...From what I've seen, if we need a second kill, it'll almost certainly have to come from me. But who knows, maybe someone will surprise me.
[ with soo-won, she'll just conclude as much flat-out. they're already in the trenches together, and she'd been genuine before—she trusts him. ]
Hopefully another poor sap on Goat's team will take the heat off of you, though.
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but.]
... should you choose to take action, you know that I won't let you face it alone.
[because the facts of the matter are - well, simple. he doesn't care so much about nova generation that he'll let people catch hilda without issue. not when ultimately, if she does choose to kill someone, it will be in order to save her team.
but - ]
.... I'm not sure if I'm willing to wait for that to happen, regarding Goat's team. My hope is that he'll have his turn soon in noticing the nova splintering... but if he doesn't, or it's instead proven that it's random and will go to the same Leader again -
I'm afraid my life and my ability to return is not something I can take a chance on. [he tilts his head] My life arguably has no more worth than any other.... but I cannot abandon my kingdom.
[and for that, he'll get his hands dirty time and time again. that is the responsibility of a king.]
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...I don't envy you, Won. I couldn't carry the weight of that responsibility.
[ she doesn't even want to consider that she'll have to kill again, though she's growing resigned to the idea. ]
But I guess there's no helping how this is turning out, huh? I'm not ready to die for anyone here—so I'll be there for you, too. [ it makes sense for them to go into this together, they can cover for each other. and it's not about camaraderie. she has to remind herself of that a lot, recently—she won't die for her friends. she won't. and she doesn't expect anyone to do the same for her. ] It's silly to try and weigh lives anyway. No one here deserves to die more than anyone else. If you ask me, some people just have to make tougher calls than others.
[ she had to make a decision, and there's nothing in her smile now that falters—she isn't so weak-willed as to regret what she's done. and she'll be there for him through thick or thin, even through those ugly choices. ]
And I'll support you, no matter what you choose.
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[is it truly a big compliment, to hear from someone that they think that their life is more expendable than yours? he'd thought about it, since the trial over the weekend and the decision that chiron made. is that something admirable?
he doesn't think so.
but perhaps that is the feelings of someone who has always been left behind, who does not find death glamorous or inviting.]
But - regardless, we are in agreement. Rather than inviting any misfortune with death pacts....
I hope to live with you to the end of all this, Hilda, and beyond. Whatever that may take.