[when she reaches for his hand - she'll find that he takes hers rather easily, holding on gently even if he doesn't quite pull his gaze away from the sky.
the irony isn't lost on him.
jeanne speaks so easily of losing - when he knows just as easily as any other that he will lose her, too. even if he thinks that he's prepared for it.
maybe if he was someone else - he would choose to steel his heart, and make the separation easier. in some cases, he's been the one to cut ties in order to maintain order, and to keep others safe.
right now, he thinks he's the most likely to get hurt.
if that's all it is, he doesn't mind continuing to hold on.]
[ After all, she is preparing herself to be lost just so people can be returned, but right now, as they are both staring at a sky that holds childhood dreams, she thinks a few things she probably shouldn't.
She's silent for a moment. ]
Tomorrow, I won't say anything myself for a while.
[ But she thinks she made it rather plain, so that may not matter. ]
Jeanne's smile is wan, but it's present. It's also almost a little lost, something that she lets show, if only because it's him next to her and not anyone else. ]
I don't. My choices remain. I am not backing down or away from them and will accept what comes to me for making them.
But I...
[ It has been harder for her to compartmentalize her feelings lately, and because she has a high chance of being voted for and because Soo-won is smart, perhaps he can notice how Jeanne reacts when other people call her by a name that he has not called her since the first time they met and perhaps what it means to lose that.
And perhaps, it is harder for Jeanne to compartmentalize her feelings because there is no longer a larger role and responsibility spelled out for her to compartmentalize into.
When it's only her and her own sense of duty without the extra armor that her class gives her. ]
It's difficult to say.
[ And even without that, it's still so hard for her to admit to some of her personal feelings. ]
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the irony isn't lost on him.
jeanne speaks so easily of losing - when he knows just as easily as any other that he will lose her, too. even if he thinks that he's prepared for it.
maybe if he was someone else - he would choose to steel his heart, and make the separation easier. in some cases, he's been the one to cut ties in order to maintain order, and to keep others safe.
right now, he thinks he's the most likely to get hurt.
if that's all it is, he doesn't mind continuing to hold on.]
.... she'll be back, I suppose.
[they both will.
he just has to hold on, until then.]
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She will.
[ After all, she is preparing herself to be lost just so people can be returned, but right now, as they are both staring at a sky that holds childhood dreams, she thinks a few things she probably shouldn't.
She's silent for a moment. ]
Tomorrow, I won't say anything myself for a while.
[ But she thinks she made it rather plain, so that may not matter. ]
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Don't hold yourself back for my sake.
[in any other situation, it would probably be meant to be teasing.
but in this case - he means it almost entirely.
jeanne made her choice long before this, and he has no intention of being the reason why she falters.]
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There really isn't, not for what she's trying parse within her own heart and mind. ]
It is not—
[ She shakes her head even if he isn't looking at her.
And much, much softer, almost too quiet: ]
It is not just that.
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he'll match her volume, wondering:]
... what is it?
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I'm ready.
[ To get her injuries treated. ]
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and so instead he says - ]
And if I decide I am not?
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[ But she hasn't let go of his hand yet, so. ]
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I don't believe you to have second thoughts on something you have already decided.
[zuko had told him - how impossible it had been to convince jeanne to not leave incriminating evidence. soo-won had known, that would be her way.
so what is it, that might get her to even delay?]
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Jeanne's smile is wan, but it's present. It's also almost a little lost, something that she lets show, if only because it's him next to her and not anyone else. ]
I don't. My choices remain. I am not backing down or away from them and will accept what comes to me for making them.
But I...
[ It has been harder for her to compartmentalize her feelings lately, and because she has a high chance of being voted for and because Soo-won is smart, perhaps he can notice how Jeanne reacts when other people call her by a name that he has not called her since the first time they met and perhaps what it means to lose that.
And perhaps, it is harder for Jeanne to compartmentalize her feelings because there is no longer a larger role and responsibility spelled out for her to compartmentalize into.
When it's only her and her own sense of duty without the extra armor that her class gives her. ]
It's difficult to say.
[ And even without that, it's still so hard for her to admit to some of her personal feelings. ]