.... it's a necessary duty - to ensure the revival of everyone we have lost. It is something that your team must accomplish still.
In truth, when I thought about those on your team that I'm familiar with, and who I would ask to ensure a complete and perfect revival... you are the person who I thought of. When I went to speak with you on Sunday.... it is because I was going to ask you to consider it.
But you had already gone far ahead of me.
[jeanne had done more than consider it. she was certain. hearing that zuko was involved later was only reassuring, really, that she would not pursue the matter alone.]
I cannot say that I was going to ask you to commit murder, while knowing you, and then say in the same breath that I would expect you to not confess - to not make it as simple and straightforward as possible. I've always known that you would.
[so in that sense.... he cannot say that he is surprised, or that he would ever assume he could talk her out of it. doing so would be changing something in jeanne's core, and he would never dream of such a grievous mistake.
he likes her for the person that she is - even if he would not make the same decisions that she would.
yet they both know why it must be done.
... even still - ]
.... but I do not want you to die. Even if I know you will come back, I do not wish for you to leave.
[selfishly. he hesitates for just a moment - before he lets his hand fall to rest over hers.]
And so....
I know it must be you - even when in the same moment I wish... it could be anyone but you.
[ It takes her aback for a moment. It is more than she thought she would receive from him. It is more than she thought he felt for her, but once the shock settles, she smiles something almost sad and wistful, looking down at where his hand rests on her top of hers. ]
It seems all I can do now is add to your sadness.
[ She cannot be sorry for the actions she is about to take when she's steadfast in her choice, but she does wish in some ways, it didn't have to be this way. ]
The weight you must bear because of what you know will come to pass tonight and tomorrow....
[ Because she knows people have come to tell him so much, too much maybe. ]
I...
[ Perhaps that hesitation is telling enough even if it is a thought she won't finish, even if it is a thought she shouldn't finish. ]
Thank you for knowing me, for acknowledging me, even if doing so is painful.
[his voice is soft then, in the quiet of the first aid room. there are many things that he doesn't find all that true - jeanne does far more than add to his sadness, and the weight that he carries doesn't feel all too heavy. it is nothing he is not accustomed to, because he knows that this is what comes with being trusted.
this is what comes with existing with others, and having them look to you. this is one of the few things that he can do, with the time and ability that he has.
but more than that:]
You needn't thank me for anything like that.
Not when the privilege of knowing you, and being able to realize that someone like you exists - far outweighs any hardship or pain.
[this story is not a happy one.
but to know that there is someone who would exist for the sake of others, who does so not because of any divine right but because it is simply what exists in her heart.... it is something that he is lucky to get to behold - and he has no intention of looking away.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ Even if she can't grant him what he wants, she wants to know.
But perhaps that's too much to ask for now, not when he does know what she intends to do. ]
no subject
In truth, when I thought about those on your team that I'm familiar with, and who I would ask to ensure a complete and perfect revival... you are the person who I thought of. When I went to speak with you on Sunday.... it is because I was going to ask you to consider it.
But you had already gone far ahead of me.
[jeanne had done more than consider it. she was certain. hearing that zuko was involved later was only reassuring, really, that she would not pursue the matter alone.]
I cannot say that I was going to ask you to commit murder, while knowing you, and then say in the same breath that I would expect you to not confess - to not make it as simple and straightforward as possible. I've always known that you would.
[so in that sense.... he cannot say that he is surprised, or that he would ever assume he could talk her out of it. doing so would be changing something in jeanne's core, and he would never dream of such a grievous mistake.
he likes her for the person that she is - even if he would not make the same decisions that she would.
yet they both know why it must be done.
... even still - ]
.... but I do not want you to die. Even if I know you will come back, I do not wish for you to leave.
[selfishly. he hesitates for just a moment - before he lets his hand fall to rest over hers.]
And so....
I know it must be you - even when in the same moment I wish... it could be anyone but you.
no subject
It seems all I can do now is add to your sadness.
[ She cannot be sorry for the actions she is about to take when she's steadfast in her choice, but she does wish in some ways, it didn't have to be this way. ]
The weight you must bear because of what you know will come to pass tonight and tomorrow....
[ Because she knows people have come to tell him so much, too much maybe. ]
I...
[ Perhaps that hesitation is telling enough even if it is a thought she won't finish, even if it is a thought she shouldn't finish. ]
Thank you for knowing me, for acknowledging me, even if doing so is painful.
no subject
No, that's not true either.
[his voice is soft then, in the quiet of the first aid room. there are many things that he doesn't find all that true - jeanne does far more than add to his sadness, and the weight that he carries doesn't feel all too heavy. it is nothing he is not accustomed to, because he knows that this is what comes with being trusted.
this is what comes with existing with others, and having them look to you. this is one of the few things that he can do, with the time and ability that he has.
but more than that:]
You needn't thank me for anything like that.
Not when the privilege of knowing you, and being able to realize that someone like you exists - far outweighs any hardship or pain.
[this story is not a happy one.
but to know that there is someone who would exist for the sake of others, who does so not because of any divine right but because it is simply what exists in her heart.... it is something that he is lucky to get to behold - and he has no intention of looking away.]